my bestie got married

2^nd of June, 2012, my friend of 11 years is now someone’s wife…as promise, I was there, helping with the preparation since she’s one of my closest friends I have and she’s the first to get married…of course I am happy for her wedding..let me tell u, there was this one feeling that lingers in my heart…it was like, my heart cannot believe she’s now belongs to someone else..i was indeed there, helping the family, but I can’t bring myself close to her during her preparation for the event (the make-up session and all), that is why dear, I prefer to busy myself with all the work..During the akad nikah ceremony, she did asked me to sit beside her, but I can’t..sorry dear, not that I don’t want, but I am not strong..that was the real reason actually..i had my tears in control for days already before the wedding, and I know I am not strong to control it during the akad nikah..I cried when they said ‘sah’..I cried while u ate that night, I cried every now and then on Saturday and Sunday, I even cried while we were on stage and I am still crying now while typing this post.. haha, what a looser I am, I know..your wedding is too big for me to handle, please know that..but then, whatever the scenario is, you are still my best friend and you will forever be mine..huhu..I know we can still meet, but it will surely be different when you have extra responsibilities to deal with…

Dear Puan Noor Akmawati, thanks for the 11 years of memories…thanks for letting me stay this long..Encik Aban Kilauan, she’s yours now, please take a good care of her…once in awhile, please let me borrow her ok.. =)

how it begin

if you were to ask me...i'm not sure how am i going to answer you...but for all i know, its because of them, i am now closer to all of you...it's because of them, i fell a huge urgency to do everything that i can possibly do to help them...even i just know them for a few months...the feeling is different...before and after they are in my life..love them till the end...forever theirs...

doktor oohh doktor

dear self..
when will you have the courage to go and see the doctor?

bahagia

ingin ku nyatakan di perut blog yang dah lama tak di sumbat makan ni.....bahawa arini daku terasa sangat bahagia...hehehe...menerima satu kejutan daripada si dia... ~~V

hehehee...plus, byk mlm asyik mimpi die..........

hehehee...ok...tu je sebenarnya..hahahahaha...


p/s: ini post utk menghibur hati sendiri... =p

Y.O.U.

when i called you telling you i'm sick...don't tell me to see the doc (i hate it!)..when i called you crying...don't ask me to to sleep (again i hate it!)....when i called you saying things..don't tell me i'm ridiculous...when i called you doing all these above..it means i MISS you and i need you to soothe me...not making me feel sadder, not to ignore me...when you do all the above..you make me feel i'm not important to you...its like you DON'T CARE at all...

when i told you i'm sad...i am really sad..i never fake it...

when i told you i miss you...i really do..even u just left a minute ago...

when i told you i love you...again, you meant the world to me...

when i told you i hate you...i lie...i just hate your coldness attitude towards me...

~Lee Ya 290708~

when i said all the stupid things...i just want you to give your attention to me...i want you to show me how i meant to you

when you walk away....you left a knife in my heart

when you ignore me on the phone....you shoot a bullet to my heart

when you left me behind and keep on walking...you dig my heart with a dagger...

it never hurts if you are the one who tell me you love me...you miss me...

it never hurts if you calm me down when i am sad...or frustrated

it never hurts if you treat me like who i meant to you...

it never hurts to show me all this rather that to assume that i will understand...

then and only then shall i be satisfy....

when there's a will, there's a way

yes, there's a saying which stated that when there's a will, there will be a way.....it is indeed true..but the problem that would arise together with the saying is...when the will is not strong enough...hahaha..and yes, that what's happening to me..

ya ya..for those who yet to know..i'm in a journey of finishing my 2nd degree...no classes..just meetings with the supervisor and the co-supervisor..no, dont get it wrong...they are nice..one is soft and the other is firm..good for me..but...the one thing that is wrong is me myself and i..i don't why am i acting this way..but i am not strong enough to continuously reading the articles....well, i've finishes the 1srt chapter..but the problem now is the 2nd and the 3rd chapters...

and ooh..more to do..my friend and i, we need to finish an abstract (supposedly pretending we are doing a paper of translating) and we have to present it during a conference this July..and we are sooo looking forward to do it (being sarcastic)..aiiihhh..

dear me...dear 'rajin'ness...dear strong will.. where are you guys....i need you guys...

p/s:: i'm did not go through with what i've write above this line..so be it...haha..so long..till we meet again